


Leap Of Faith And Love

by LadyMorgaine76



Series: Breathe My Love... [5]
Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Before Battle, Father-Son Relationship, Healing, M/M, Trust
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-19
Updated: 2019-12-19
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:21:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21854410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyMorgaine76/pseuds/LadyMorgaine76
Summary: A father and a son begin finding their way into forgiveness and a new start.Baz keeps on learning new things about his condition.Mitali Bunce worries.And someone takes a literal leap...
Relationships: Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch/Simon Snow
Series: Breathe My Love... [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1542856
Comments: 4
Kudos: 23





	Leap Of Faith And Love

**Author's Note:**

> Again...  
> Tags on mobile don't work. You can't write your own.  
> So...  
> There's that!  
> I hope you enjoy this fic.  
> Please leave kudos and drop a comment! 
> 
> HAPPY HOLIDAYS, PEOPLE!

**Malcolm**

My son…

My son…

What have I done?

You needed me and I closed myself. I wasn't enough, was I?

I had it all perfectly compartmentalised. In perfect little boxes.

Pretend you weren't turned.

Pretend I wasn't left feeling hollow after your mother died.

I failed you miserably when you needed me the most, didn't I?

You were right in almost everything thing you said after returning from your impromptu voyage to the other side of the Atlantic…

But you were wrong in one thing. I always loved you, my son.

All of you.

Unconditionally.

Even when I feared more the opinions of the Old Families' Heads, than I paid attention to how out of touch we were becoming. How many white lies we kept as a wall between us.

I made you feel ashamed of yourself. Of being a vampire.

Made you feel like you had to downplay the fact that you're gay.

Made you feel like I was disappointed in you for that…

I'm not. I never was. I was just so afraid that every single person that mocked me for being nothing more than a Grimm, whispered on corners that Natasha had to be out of her mind when she married me, would use that against you, against the House of Pitch.

I was more obsessed in keeping her name and heritage alive, against everything and everyone, that I hurt you in the process.

I hate myself for doing that.

I can't change the past.

But I can change how I act from now on.

You're my son and I love you! I'm going to make sure you know that from this day forward!

**Baz**

I think my boyfriend just managed to get "adopted" by a dragon…

Trust Simon to manage such a thing!

We've temporarily turned the dining hall into a Situation Room and I'm trying very hard to pay attention to what I guess is our very first official debriefing before we (finally) go out there and confront the creatures surrounding Watford, but there's a huge moss green dragon outside, crouching on the grass, looking in through the windows on the far end of the hall.

I swear she sounds just like she's whining! She'll only stay quiet when Simon turns to the windows to watch her and wave!

It's actually quite fascinating, to be completely honest.

I still don't understand how Simon was just able to forge this connection with the dragon. It's another variable in the mesmerising complexity that is my boyfriend…

If I get lucky, I might actually earn myself the right to spend the rest of my life uncovering all of the facets to Simon Snow!

The rest of my life…

I have a choice on that too, apparently.

Misinformation only lasts until you ask the right questions to the right people, I guess!

The World of Mages was so adamant about casting out (or destroying, preferably.) every single vampire in the UK, that no one stopped to think that maybe we should have studied them a bit more thoroughly.

As it is, all we had was pieces of loose information mixed with an unhealthy dose of media fed myths and wrong depictions. (Just because Robert Pattinson was hot, it doesn't mean sparkling vampires didn't make me want to hit my head against the wall.)

But since we have a type of truce with Nicodemus Petty and half a dozen of his friends, I have been able to have some pressing questions answered.

The most important of them all concerning the supposed vampire immortality!

Apparently, vampirism acts as some kind of mutation and the only way to become immortal is to feed on human blood.

Making a long story short, human blood replaces all of our vampire mutated cells, pretty much maintaining our bodies young either forever or for as long as we keep on feeding on humans… which I'm not interested in doing!

Nicodemus explained that, feeding on human blood, any other vampire would cease to age around seventeen or eighteen, or at whatever adult age they'd been turned.

Since I plan to keep on feeding on animals, I'll keep aging at the same rate any other ordinary person.

(I used the word "human" detaching myself from the notion that I'm still human and Simon glared at me.) (He was quite vocal later on about every single reason why I am _" ... bloody well alive and very much human!"_ ) (He's got more faith in me and my self worth than I do myself.)

The vampires accompanying Nicodemus looked at me like I had lost my mind! They couldn't get their heads around me preferring to not be immortal!

But I do! 

I can go on to have a semblance of a normal life. I'm not doomed to watch each and every one of my loved ones grow old and die while I just… stay… 

I never wanted that. I want to grow old (with Simon by my side, preferably.), live a fulfilling life and then leave this world like any other person.

Immortality would drive me crazy, probably… thankfully I can skip that!

(I would skip being a vampire entirely, but as far as we know there's no way to eliminate vampirism from one's system.)

Snowdrop audibly growls outside drawing everyone's attention. She's getting restless and it's making Simon jittery. 

I asked him yesterday at dinner just how he knew the dragon was a "she". (No one had mentioned that. He just knew…)

He said she had told him! Just like that was the most natural and ordinary thing in the world.

Simon killed _one_ dragon.

He would have likely succeeded in killing a second one if I hadn't jumped off the ramparts to stop him.

None of those dragons ever _communicated_ with Simon… So, what was different now? Why this particular dragon?

The Headmistress clears her throat, focusing us on the matters at hand.

"Does everyone understand what they have to do tomorrow?"

We all nod. Simon his filled with that old tenacity I learned to love. 

He's holding on to the sword. Without his magic, the sword has no place to go anymore. We'll definitely have to go to the ancient armoury beneath the Weeping Tower and find him a belt and a scabbard.

"Simon, I gather there's no chance I can convince you to stay behind?" Headmistress Bunce turns to him with a concerned look.

"Not really, no…" His answer does little to surprise me. Everyone in this room that knows Simon even a bit, knows he'd never back down from the fight, no matter what!

"I thought as much." The Headmistress nods. " And since the Salisburys have informed me they'll be joining us with their respective bonded dragons, Lady Salisbury asked me to tell you that Snowdrop will be fighting with you."

I watch has Simon's eyes widen in surprise. "Really? Wicked!" He turns the brightest smile at me. I don't quite know what to make of this development but, on one hand I get to see my boyfriend happier than I've seen him lately. On the other hand, I'm much more relieved about his safety knowing he'll have a dragon protecting him at all times.

**Simon**

Baz has a smug smile on his face.

And it's not because he's filled with expectations about the upcoming battle. No, he's aiming that smile at me because apparently Snowdrop appointed herself to be my guardian, I guess…

I mean, I'm not complaining! I get to go into battle instead of being left behind and I'll have a dragon by my side? Who would have thought! 

I wasn't so Sure of our overall chances, but by the day we're getting more and more messages of mages joining our ranks. 

We also have an extra seven vampires helping us. Nicodemus has a very personal reason to stand with us, ( he's still quite sentimental about Watford.) the other six were Normals before being turned, but it seems they hold some loyalty towards Nicodemus for whatever reason.

So, we have mages, vampires, dragons and me… with wings... and the sword of Mages back on my hands!

We can do this… I think.

"Ready to go bond with your new best friend before tomorrow's battle?" Baz smirks, sliding his hand on mine. His touch is light, awaiting. I grab his hand firmly. (I'm never letting go again. I'm never backing down.) 

"Jealous of a dragon?" I return his smile.

"Are you joking? This new friendship of yours with Snowdrop is a bonus for me!" His smile widens even more. If he keeps on giving me these absolutely bright smiles, I might just have to kiss him!

Penny's mum ends the reunion and everyone starts to leave. We stay behind, Baz, Penny and I. 

"Mum." Penny approaches her once all the others are gone. 

"Yes, dear?"

"We need to go into the old armoury." 

The Headmistress peers at Penny from the screen of her laptop.

"Why?"

"Simon needs something to help him carry the sword." Penny says, matter-of-factly. Headmistress Bunce rolls her chair back a bit and looks at the three of us.

"It's nice to actually be asked permission to do something for once.." She keeps her gaze on us. "Instead of, you know, going off on a whim, without warning anyone…"

"Mum…" Penny sighs. "Not again… we already said we're sorry…"

"Do you know what it took to find a way to take down that video of you fighting those vampires in that… Renaissance fair? And even worse, to convince the entire bloody Internet that that was an elaborate stunt? This entire subject is still not entirely solved!" The Headmistress rubs her temples and we're exchanging guilty looks between us, but she's not finished yet. "What were you thinking? Do you realise what could have happened to you out there? I'm getting too old for this…" I see her slump back, shaking her head. "Just… go… And no more half-arsed plans and hero complexes! I need the three of you to end this entire situation unarmed so I can yell at you a bit more…"

We make to leave the hall, but Headmistress Bunce suddenly gets up to meet us by the door. She pulls Penny into a tight hug and than proceeds to do the same with me and Baz too.

Baz stiffens out of surprise for an instant, but he gives in to the hug.

(He's not used to such open displays of affection, still.) (I love to see him opening up, little by little.)

We're heading out to the underground level of the tower when Baz's phone chimes. He takes one look at it and frowns. I look at him curiously.

"What is it? Anything wrong?" I ask him. He shrugs. He's been doing that often. Penny says he's unconsciously mimicking me. Kind of like me unsuccessfully (and less unconsciously…) raising an eyebrow, I guess.

"Not really. I think... It's my father."

"Well, what are you waiting for?" Penny crosses her arms. "Answer him! Come on Simon, let your boyfriend have some privacy while he speaks with his father."

"You don't have to leave!" Baz tries to argue with us, already taking the phone to his ear. I shake my head and start following Penny down.

"Yes, we do, love!" I assure him. Penny turns to Baz as we hear him greet his father. She soundlessly mouths _"communication is key"_ , which actually draws a smile out of Baz.

**Baz**

"Hello, father." I greet him cooly. I still don't know where we stand after our discussion, when my father and Daphne insisted in dragging me to Oxford after coming back home. I agreed but with the condition of taking Simon with me.

"Basilton… Son, I…" He sounds unsure of himself. It's awkward to imagine him like this. I wait for him to speak again. "Listen. I just wanted you to know that… you were right… I know a conversation on the phone won't solve things, but I needed you to know that I have been thinking about all I said to you, all you said back, but more than that, all the ways I've acted throughout the years." My father draws out a deep sigh while I'm stunned into silence. I want him to go on. I need him to go on. He does. "There's so much we have to mend, so much I need to explain to you… We'll be there with you tomorrow-"

"Father, no! It's too dangerous!" I interrupt him. 

"No, son. I have to do this. I need to do this. For you, for your mother, for all of our family. I won't hide in Oxford while my son and his boyfriend march into the frontlines."

I close my eyes, trying to ignore the tightness in my throat. It's the first time my father refers to Simon as my boyfriend…

"But… what about the children?"

"They'll stay safe with Daphne. She's agreed to stay behind. You know her magical abilities aren't suited for battle." 

It's true. Daphne's family were always healers and empaths. Besides, I'm sure she'll find a way to give us support from the outside.

"You'd fight alongside me?"

"Proudly so." There's a tone of renewed resolution to him. 

Sometimes I think if deep down inside we've all been lost one way or the other…

We're all broken in some way, stubbornly trying to put the puzzle back together on our own. Trying to mend in silence and solitude.

But now we're all coming together, aren't we? 

"Father?"

"Yes, son?"

"I don't hate you. I know what I said the last time and I'm sorry…" It's hard to stop my voice from wavering. This phone call caught me completely unawares. I'm not used to being like this with my father, which is - I realise now. - a sad thing to admit.

"You were upset. We have so much to talk about, after all this is over… Is everything alright over there? Is there anything you need?"

"We're all fine. There's a lot to talk about! Simon has a dragon friend now, and I don't know if aunt Fiona told you, but we managed to get the sword of Mages back!" It feels great to be able to speak so casually to my father. I hope we can keep doing this afterwards.

My father chuckles. 

An honest to god, happy chuckle!

"She had told me about the sword, but the rest is news to me! So, I guess the Salisburys really are joining forces in full. Dragons and all. That's good." I listen to him sigh deeply. "I'll see you first thing tomorrow, is that ok?" I hum in approval. "Son? I love you."

I feel my tears as they run freely down my cheeks. I've been needing to hear those words for a very long time…

The word "love" hasn't exactly been thrown around easily between us as I've seen happen in other families. 

I have my fair share of responsibility in that.

"I love you too… Dad!"

His intake of air is shockingly audible on my ear. I think we're both crying now. That's ok. There's something extremely healing about letting ourselves shed these tears.

It's not a definite solution to the way we distanced ourselves for fifteen years, but it's a beginning. 

Small steps is a good way to start…

**Penny**

Simon is driving me nuts.

This armoury is old, unused apparently, damp, cold and utterly disorganized!

I just want him to choose one damn belt! It's not like the choice is overwhelming…

We found a grand total of six usable belts with scabbards that fit Simon's sword. (Is it still Simon's sword? I mean, Baz entrusted it back to Simon…) (There's way too much information for me to process, lately.)

"What do you think?" Simon squints at the belt in his hand. "I'm gonna look ridiculous, aren't I?"

"No. You won't. And that looks just fine! Can we just go? It's cold down here… I'm pretty sure there's a leak somewhere. This is no way to store old weapons…" Honestly! What was the Mage thinking letting this place go all damp and… musty?! This is unpleasant and I just want to go outside and warm up in the sun. 

The door creaks and Baz enters. He goes straight to Simon and I pretend I don't notice his eyes are rimmed red.

"Are you okay?" Simon whispers gently.

"Yes…" And he leans to rest his forehead on Simon's. I feel like I'm intruding, but I can't bring myself to break this moment. 

"Your father… He…" Baz shakes his head at Simon's words.

"No, love. My father didn't say anything wrong. Quite the contrary!" His whole face lights up. It's quite something to see Baz smiling so easily these last days. "I think we're on the right path too." I look at my shoes like they're the most interesting thing in the world as Simon perches himself on Baz's neck to kiss him. 

I've intruded more than once and I don't think that was helpful…

"You found what you wanted?" He asks.

Simon shows him the belt and I finally chime in.

"Can we go back out now? This feel like a meat locker."

"Are you two going to spend the day training spells? I don't want to be late for lunch…"

Baz and I chuckle at him.

"You and your stomach, love." 

Simon simply shrugs.

"We should actually go through the spells for tomorrow, just to be sure we have everything covered." I tell them. I open the door and make them hurry out of there. We go up the stairs to the ground level and I let out a contented sigh when we leave the tower to bask in the late morning sun.

"And we will." Baz says, walking between me and Simon. They're holding hands all the way. "But first I was thinking of trying something that's been in the back of my mind for a while now."

I shoot I'm a grin.

"Soooo… you're going back to Mummers for a while?"

Simon, bless him, looks puzzled, but Baz caches on instantly and stands there, glaring at me.

"No. Get your mind out of the gutter." He rolls his eyes, turning to Simon. "Let's go. I think Penny spent too much time on the armoury's basement."

They leave as I laugh loudly.

Might as well go bother Agatha and make sure Shepard hasn't gotten himself into trouble.

**Baz**

I swear, sometimes it seems like Penny like to embarrass me in front of Simon!

I mean, it's not like I haven't thought about _that_ …

We tried it once with a bit of a disastrous result. (His distancing began there.) (I still don't know exactly what I did.)

Sex with my boyfriend would be great! But now's not the time and we're taking things slowly.

Communication before… _action_ …

No. What I have planned is something else.

Nicodemus explained lots of things to me.

Things I didn't know about and others I had been finding out on my own by experience. (Being shot in America was quite the practical lesson!) 

I know I'm unnaturally fast and strong, but I never tested my limits. He said our bodies can take a lot. We're sturdy, out of a better word.

I can jump out of a tree without effort.

I've tried jumping from higher places and so far so good.

But I've never tried jumping from the ramparts or anything as high without using "float like a butterfly". The problem is that it's a bit of a draining spell, and I've been more and more keen on trying this.

On the downside, this can end up being a bit painful.

"What's your plan?" Simon asks me as soon as he notices me leading us to the ramparts. Snowdrop flies by us, but doesn't stop.

Good... I need the privacy.

"You'll see." I tell him.

We reach the wall and I lead him up the stairs. I go to the edge and look down.

That's… really high! 

But that's why I brought my very own dragon boy! (He told me last night he was considering removing the wings and tail surgically.) (I might have made a very unbecoming whining sound.) (He laughed at me and than he kissed me, so that's a plus.)

"Don't tell me you were planning to throw me from a place higher than just the stairs?" Simon asks me, with the most cheeky smile I've seen in weeks. (Months?)

"Ah, ah… funny." I roll my eyes at him. "But, no. Actually I'm throwing myself off!"

He laughs.

He thinks I'm joking. That's sweet…

"I'm serious. I want to find out if I can jump from this high and land safely."

His smile falls and his entire face changes as his jaw drops.

"ARE YOU ABSOLUTELY INSANE? NO! JUST… NO!"

And there it is… as I expected.

I pull him towards me staring into his eyes.

"Simon? Love? Breathe, ok? I'm going to be fine. Vampires are strong. Stronger than I thought myself! I want to test this and you'll help me."

He shakes his head vehemently. His expression is between angry and scared.

I'm still doing this. He's not more stubborn than me.

"Baz, please don't…"

"Simon… I need you to trust me on this…"

He's still not convinced.

"This is NOT Twilight, Baz!!!" He yells at me

"I'm aware of that! But I've been kept in a coffin for 6 weeks, I've been shot at repeatedly and I'm still here! What if I can do this? What if I don't have to use 'float like a butterfly' anymore?"

"What if you just fall down like a rock?" I knew he'd fight me on this. That's how he is. That's how we are.

"Use your wings Dragon Boy!" He pull him closer, kissing him gently on the tip of his nose. He grumbles but I can feel him starting to relax and give in. 

"I hate you!" He leans on me and I hold him tighter.

"I love you too." I look into his eyes as I say it. Then I let go of him. 

This is it...

I walk back and run to gain momentum. 

"This is insane!"

I hear Simon yelling, in a terrified tone, just behind me as I jump from the ramparts.

It's… exhilarating! I feel my body, the instincts I had no idea of possessing taking over.

It's not at all like the movies portray it! I'm not floating. I'm falling. But I can feel myself focus on the approach. I see the floor beneath me with clarity. I feel my muscles tightening, my breathing adjusting to the velocity.

Somehow I know my body can and will withstand the landing.

"Baz!" 

"I'm Ok!" I yell at Simon, already flying in my direction. I smile at him as he appears at my side. "Trust me, love."

I concentrate on the landing. Lower the gravity center. Right… I bend my torso forward, making myself smaller.

Don't stick the landing, I remind myself.

I bend the knees and prepare the first contact with the ground. My feet touch the ground and I allow my whole body to duck down on a roll that will avoid any injuries.

I'm down. I've landed safely. I bloody well did it!

I get up quickly enough to see Simon also on his feet beside me.

"You're insane, you know that? You're a bloody idiot and you're going to be the death of me!" Simon chastises me with more remaining fear than actual animosity.

I can't help but laugh as I reach him and pull him into a kiss that he doesn't pull back from.

Merlin and Morgana! It feels so good to be like this at last!

It took us so long to get here! But if all of _that_ was necessary for us to finally be in tune with each other, then it was worth it!

"Sloppy landing…" He chuckles against my mouth, his arms wrapped tight around my neck.

"Shush! I'm still practicing!" I admonish him, smiling widely, adrenaline rushing through me still. "Give me a few more days."

We walk back inside holding close.

Now I just have to mentally prepare myself to get properly yelled at for my daredevil stunt by Penny.

… And Fiona.

… And quite likely Headmistress Bunce, when she finds out.

… And my father first thing tomorrow!

Oh, well!

I lead an interesting life.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



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